Always and Forever
by Garowyn
Summary: Ever wonder what married life with Mai and parenthood would be for Joey Wheeler? Short and sweet stories on what could happen in the life of our favorite, lovable dork, er, duelist. DISCONTINUED for now.
1. The Piece of Chocolate Cake

**A/N: I don't own YGO. This sort of picks up after "Good Thing Going" (By me of course, a Joey/Mai romance—you might want to read that so you're not too lost) thanks to the suggestion of Darkhope (Thank you indeed). ****NOTE: Some characters could be somewhat OOC because they have changed over the years leading into adulthood but who doesn't? **

* * *

The Piece of Chocolate Cake

"Oh My Gosh!"

Mai Valentine, soon to be Mai Wheeler, jumped from her chair in the restaurant and threw her arms around Joseph a.k.a. Joey Wheeler in excitement. "Ack! Easy Mai—my dessert!" Joey watched helplessly as his half-eaten piece of chocolate cake, his favorite, toppled onto the rich, red, carpeted floor. "I wasn't finished yet…"

"So sorry about that sir!" One waiter (obviously this was his first night) hurried over to their table and cleaned the mess quickly. It wasn't his fault but in his young mind he seemed to think so. "I'll get you another one!" He announced, standing up with a thin smile.

"Will I be charged for that one too?" Joey called out but the waiter didn't hear him as he disappeared into the kitchen.

"Joey, you moron!" Mai snapped, shaking him by the shoulders. "Didn't you hear me? I said yes!"

"Huh? Oh yeah! Wow! I mean, you'll marry me?" Joey asked incredulously, a goofy grin spreading across his face at Mai's curt nod. "Aw yeah! I must be the luckiest man in the world!" He laughed.

"Of course you are. You're marrying _me_!" Mai settled back into her seat and smoothed out the wrinkles in her dress. "I can't believe you, Joey Wheeler. You struck me off as the type of guy who fears commitment. I'm really surprised." She remarked, inspecting her neatly polished nails.

"Eh, you are?" Joey raised an eyebrow. At that moment, the waiter reappeared with another piece of chocolate cake. "Oh boy!" Joey grabbed his fork, wiped it clean with a napkin (it had dropped to the floor as well) and dug in greedily, wishing he could forever savor that sweet taste of chocolate cake.

"We're going to have to set a date. We'll need a church, a reception hall, a bridal shower, and a wedding dress! Oh and…" Mai had certainly been bit by the marriage bug as she ticked off plans on her fingertips. Her dessert, a small slice of lemon meringue pie, was barely touched.

"Uh, what am I supposed to do?" Joey asked when Mai reached the little wedding details such as tables, chairs, and invitations. He wasn't much for organizing something as big and wonderful like this, but hey, it would be his wedding too and he ought to have a say in _something_.

"You can choose the napkins. Anyway, we'll need a—" She was cut off, inevitably.

"Napkins! Can't I choose other things too?" Joey demanded, spraying the table with crumbs of chocolate cake from his mouth.

"Ew, Joey!" Mai frowned at him. "Can't you at least act with some dignity!" The restaurant was rather high class and Joey had been saving for months to afford it here. Other customers, the ritzy rich people no doubt, cast snobbish glances at the two.

"Sorry." Joey grabbed a napkin and wiped his mouth. "But can I pick the spot for our honeymoon?"

"Your bill, sir!" That same waiter returned to their table and left right away to attend to another table of customers.

"Thanks man." Joey picked up the bill and read over its contents. "Hey! I shouldn't be charged for that piece of cake! And I thought the salad on the side was free! Isn't water supposed to be free too!"

"Joey pipe down!" Mai growled and snatched the bill from his hand and scanned it. "Hmm, you are right about the water."

"Water is _always_ free!" Joey insisted, still hollering questions and demands at the waiter. "I ain't payin' for that first piece of cake that _fell on the floor_!" He shook his fist, trying to appear menacing but failing to do so.

"Joey!" Mai dug out her purse from under the table. The white tablecloth reached the floor so it was a fairly safe place to put her purse since they would know if someone was trying to steal it by attempting to crawl under the table… "I'm so embarrassed. Let's get out of here _now_!"

"What? Hey no, Mai, put that back. I'm paying for everything tonight!" Joey said proudly, reaching for his wallet and setting the proper amount on the table, next to the small dish full of mints and candies.

"Really? Now that is a shocker." Mai retorted, apparently shocked indeed that he was paying for _everything_.

Joey, having forgotten about the issue with the piece of chocolate cake, pushed the chair back out from him and dashed over to Mai's side of the table. "Here, I'll help ya with your coat." He picked up her white dress coat and held it out while Mai slipped into it. "Did ya want the mints too?" He asked, grabbing the whole lot of them.

"Joey Wheeler, are you implying something?" Mai glared at him with her hands on her hips. More people looked up to see what the matter was this time.

"Huh? No! No! I was just wonderin' if you wanted them because if you don't, I'll have them!" He responded, grinning.

Mai sighed, giving him a faint smile. "I can't stay mad at you for long anymore, can I." It was more of a statement than a question. Mai lead the way to the front of the restaurant and out the double doors to the parking lot.

Joey pressed the button on his car keys and listened for that quick, staccato sound of the locks unlocking and opened the door for his fiancée. "There you go, milady." He slammed the door once she was in but missed one little thing…

"Joey! My dress!" Mai opened the door and grabbed the part of her dress that the door had slammed shut on.

"Oops! Sorry." Joey jumped into the driver's seat and started the engine up. Carefully backing out of the parking space, he asked Mai a question. "So, do you like the ring?" He was referring to the engagement ring on her finger.

"It's very pretty…you didn't get it from the dollar store, did you?" She glanced at him suspiciously. At that same time they were both reminded of the incident where Mai had followed Joey around the mall, hoping to see what he had picked out for her birthday and found him looking at a few things in the dollar store. As it turned out, he was buying them for a gag gift and got her something nicer elsewhere but she was still a little steamed about it. After all, it was just last week.

"No I got it from that jewelry place." Joey answered cautiously. When no reply came, he added hastily, "Honest!"

"How much did you have to pay?" She pressed on, giving him a scrutinizing gaze. Mai was always a hard one to please.

"Eh, is that really important?" Joey nearly swerved into the next car (earning himself a beep) because of his nervousness.

"I guess not. All that matters is…WE'RE GETTING MARRIED!"

Joey winced when Mai hugged him again, completely unaware that they were within busy traffic. Another car sounded it's horn. "Get a life, ya dumb clown!" Joey, having rolled down his window, shouted.

"Are you calling me a dumb clown?" Mai shrieked, glaring daggers.

Joey sighed and pressed the UP button on the side. "No, Mai! I was talking to the guy who almost hit us!" He wondered what else was going to go wrong on what had been intended as a perfect evening.

Mai reached over and turned on the radio, not wanting to sit and listen, so to speak, to the awkward silence that had settled. A rather catchy song filled the vehicle.

Joey smiled at the words. It reminded him of his silly crush on her when he was a teenager. Of course he wasn't quite as blatant about it like Tristan and Duke had been about his sister. "Grr…"

"Hmm?" Mai turned to look at him. "Did you say something?"

Joey shook his head, out of his reverie. "Nope!" He said cheerfully as they turned into the underground parking lot for Mai's apartment building. It was good to be back in Domino City. Once Joey found a temporary parking space, both got out of the vehicle. "I'll walk you to your door." He said as they departed the lot into the elevator that would take them to the sixth floor.

"Oh Joey! I can't wait!" Mai commented as the elevator started upward. She clung to his arm, resting her head on his shoulder. They were roughly the same height. "I wonder what our kids will be like…"

"What!" Joey's voice could probably be heard outside the apartment building. "Kids? What do you mean kids? Isn't it a little too early to be thinking about kids?" He demanded, images of diapers, booties, toys, and messes flying about in his mind.

"I know they're going to be messy," Mai continued on as if she hadn't heard him. She didn't like the idea of changing diapers or doing little things like that but when the marriage bug bites, it bites. "But just think of how adorable they'll look in the cute outfits I'm going to buy!"

"Hello! Mai!" Joey waved his hand in front of her face as they exited the elevator onto the sixth floor where the dim hallway lights awaited them. "Didn't ya hear me? It's too early to be thinking about having kids, you know."

"Nonsense!" Mai walked ahead, fishing for her keys in her small purse as they approached 6D. "It's never to early to plan ahead."

"Hey, wanna hear a joke?" Joey changed the subject, not wanting to dwell on the thought of babies and their endless crying. "I read this book the other day called _Plunge to the Sea_ by _Ilene Dover_. Ha! Get it? _Ilene Dover_! _I leaned over_! Ha! Ha!" (I.)

"You're so juvenile." Mai rolled her eyes at his corny joke. She unlocked the door and stepped partway in. "What a wonderful evening…" She sighed and turned to her fiancée. "Goodnight, Joey Wheeler." She gave him a long kiss. When she parted, Joey's eyes were still closed, lost in the kiss. "Joey." She said curtly and his eyes snapped open. "Go home and get some sleep. We've got a lot of planning to do!" Her eyes suddenly seemed to glaze over, obviously seeing other things, picturing their future. They were married and living in a small yellow house with ten pets, surrounded by a white picket fence, with an apple tree where 5 kids fought over who got to use the swing.

Yeah right.

"Love ya, Mai!" Joey called back behind him as he headed for the elevator. He felt a little embarrassed at being caught with his eyes still closed.

"Love you."

When she closed the door, Joey jumped and kicked his heels together. "I'm getting married! Wait till I tell Yugi and Serenity and Tristan and the others!" He pressed the DOWN button and waited patiently. All of a sudden, something occurred to him. "I wasn't supposed to pay for that piece of cake!"

* * *

_(I.)—I do not own the joke used. Found it in an Archie Comics Digest. Had a good laugh. Review! Greatly appreciated. _


	2. The Best Man Feud

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I do not own YGO. This chapter is dedicated to animefantickid25. :)**

* * *

The Best Man Feud

Bliss. Sheer bliss.

He was in heaven.

Mai had stayed in his apartment all day until very late at night, going on and on about the little things that needed to be prepared for their wedding. All he had done, besides picking which napkin color and design was best, was nod his head and smile. The little things weren't all that interesting anyway, which was why they were labeled "the little things". Mai had finally left (after Joey walked her to her door again to make sure she was safe) and he had arrived back in his apartment at half past midnight. Due to the unfixable leak under his kitchen sink, which would remain unfixable until he paid off other things, sleep had been stolen from him and he had been chasing it for the longest time until…!

Ah, he caught it. Joey was sleeping ever so peacefully under the covers, snoring like there was no tomorrow. However, tomorrow was Saturday, an important day according to Mai, so he was unable to dream on like there really was no tomorrow.

Why?

What a silly question!

Who else in their right mind because of undying excitement would unlock his door because they had a spare key and wake him from his slumber?

"Time to get up!" Mai declared at seven in the morning, opening his bedroom door. "We're going out for breakfast with Yugi and the others, don't you remember?" She proceeded to sashay over to the window and shamelessly opened the blinds, revealing a busy downtown with sunlight pouring into his room. Her long, blonde hair cascaded over her shoulders in waves, and she wore a black, fashionable jogging outfit, even though she didn't plan on jogging. Weekdays she went to the spa for a workout right after her work at the downtown salon. From 8 in the morning straight to 2 in the afternoon, she worked her butt off for good-paying customers.

At that moment Joey chose to let out a rather deafening snore and turn over to the other side. "Jes' a few more minutes…zzzz…" Joey was off in lullaby land once more. Sighing heavily, Mai walked over to the bottom edge of his bed and yanked the covers off of him. This immediately woke him up because he suddenly felt, well, cold…and exposed. "Hey! Who's there?" He demanded, blinking and sitting up. His brown eyes focused on the beauteous vision before him.

"Good Morning Hun." Mai smirked, crossing her arms.

"Mai?" Joey's eyes drifted downward to what he was wearing: boxers. "Gah!" He grabbed the covers from the floor and covered himself. "What are you doing here so early! And I'm not wearing any pajamas!"

"Oh give it a rest!" Mai headed out to his small living room. "You look no different than if you were going to the beach. Now hurry up and get dressed! Our breakfast date is in half an hour!"

"Half an hour?" Joey glanced at his clock radio, seeing the red digital numbers 8:03 A.M. He was slightly confused; he had made no breakfast date with Mai—oh yes! The day after he had proposed to Mai, they had called all their friends (and family too of course) and even sent out invitations, courtesy of Mai who used her charm and good looks to get the stationary store clerk to have ready and send out all 200 invitations. Needless to say, he was invited too.

This was two weeks ago. Bakura even flew out from England the week after and even Tristan, who had flown in from California, had been keeping in touch with everyone including Serenity. Tristan…Serenity…Duke was bound to be there too! Had they rid themselves of all grudges and hostilities? Most likely not. "Grr…"

"Joey, its five after 8!"

"Ack! I have less than twenty-five minutes to get ready!" Joey jumped out of bed and raced for the bathroom and started up the shower. It wasn't until ten seconds in did he realize he had forgotten to shut the door and undress himself and turn the water temperature up a notch. Thus, he found himself under cold water with only his boxers on, with a cool draft floating in. "Argh! The morning of all mornings!"

"For Pete's sake, what are you doing in the shower with your clothes on!" Mai began to laugh her head off, sitting on the couch in the living room, watching an early morning soap opera. The bathroom was visible from the living room.

"Tell me something I don't know! Whoa!" Joey shouted back, having almost slipped on the floor because of wet feet. He slammed the door shut.

* * *

Minutes later, time found the happy couple speed walking to a local restaurant. It wasn't too far from either apartment building so there was no need to drive. It would just add unnecessary pollution to the air anyway. "You better hope the buffet is still on!" Mai told him as he held the door open for her. "Look! It's crowded already!" 

"I already told you I'm sorry!" Joey shook his head. It was another one of their arguments. They happened from time to time, ranging from lateness to annoyance because of stupidity.

"Oh never mind." Mai stopped short when they reached the waitress who had a fake smile plastered on her face, waiting to hand them menus and direct them to their seats. "Excuse me, some people are waiting for us and—"

"Mai! Joey! Over here!" A very familiar voice, one that Joey had not heard in a long time, called out.

"Is that…Yugi!" Joey's jaw dropped open as he and his fiancée spotted the man in question…

"He's—! He's—!" Clearly Mai was at a loss of words. Through Joey, they had only communicated by email and Joey hadn't seen him since graduation from high school.

There standing in front of a window with a table full of friendly faces was Yugi Muto…_and he was a few inches taller! _"Hi guys!" Yugi's voice was even…_deeper! _It had a very faint resemblance to Yami Yugi's voice. "It's great to see you two!"

Mai, slack-jawed as well, approached the table slowly with Joey right behind her, just as shocked, especially when they saw the appearances of the rest of the gang including Mokuba Kaiba...

Wait—what?

"Don't tell me Kaiba's here too!" Joey pointed at Mokuba as they neared the table, causing only a few people to look up this time.

"Oh that's right!" Mai stopped and turned to her future husband. "I invited the Kaiba brothers too, as well as…" She named names that were vaguely familiar to Joey. "I want everyone we know there!" Obviously she couldn't care less if they were once enemies or not. Mai was so caught up in her wedding and wanted tons of people there!

"Weevil! Rex! Mako? _Valon_?" Joey nearly shouted. "Why him! I don't want him at my wedding!"

"Oh don't worry about it." Mai brushed him off and resumed walking to the table of friends. She was well aware of the rivalry between Joey and Valon for her and it probably was still there…it boosted her ego generously to know that two guys had been fighting over her. Not actually literally…but the rivalry had been there. "Now come on, aren't you hungry?"

The mention of food lifted his spirits as they finally reached the table. "Yugi! Tristan! Serenity! Tea!" Joey turned to the other end. "Duke! Bakura! Mokuba!" He paused. "Wow, you guys all look different…"

"Oh Joey I'm so happy for you two!" Serenity stood up from her seat and moved over to hug him. She then hugged Mai. "I can't believe it!" Serenity had a job at a large department store in the city, a place flourishing with many customers.

"I think we all saw it coming!" Tristan remarked with a grin. "Hey old buddy! It's been a long time!" Tristan wore a sweater with the name of his former college on the front and back. He was tanned, no doubt from the California sun. Tristan was planning on moving back to Domino City however, for obvious reasons.

"How's it going, Wheeler?" Duke crossed his arms. He was still wearing dice earrings but wore more sophisticated clothing. He had hit it big time in business.

"Hi Joey!" Mokuba added his own greeting. Mokuba was about eighteen years old by now and kept his long mane in a ponytail. He was still vice president of Kaiba Corporation but Seto usually did all the work for the company. Mokuba chose to handle the newly built Kaiba Land in Canada and was the Chieftain, so to speak, of all Kaiba Land amusement parks internationally.

"I'm so excited for you guys!" Tea exclaimed, her once shoulder-length brown hair now longer. She worked part-time at a bookstore and part-time as a dance instructor, and frequently appeared in musicals.

"Me too!" Yugi smiled at the bewildered couple. Yugi was now an assistant to the professor at the local college that taught all about Egyptian Mythology, Greek Mythology, and others of the sort. This was no surprise.

"Hello Joey! Mai!" Bakura gave a nod at each of them, grinning. "It has been quite a while." Last but not least, Bakura took an interest in travelling and was co-hosting a TV series with his father on different places in the world…

"…" Joey was speechless. All of his friends had changed so much in five years! He felt like he hadn't changed at all. Come to think of it…no, he had changed but not much according to Mai, fondly of course.

"Well, aren't you going to sit down?" Mai broke him out of his thoughts. Everyone else was staring at him expectantly. One empty chair beside Mai was also waiting, seemingly staring at him expectantly too.

"Oh, right." Joey grabbed the back of the chair and sat down, pushing himself close to the table. An untouched menu lay in front of him. Of course many people had once touched it, which is kind of a disgusting thought, but Joey opened it anyway, not looking at the gang. It was just so, so weird to see them looking so different than what he was used to.

Apparently everyone else noticed his reluctance to look up. "Hey Joey, are you going to be ordering from the menu or from the buffet?" Tristan asked.

Joey looked up at that and saw that everyone was waiting for him. All had left their menus unopened for the waiters to pick up again. "How about you guys go get your food. Joey and I will wait here and watch the table." Serenity suggested, a little more open than she was many years ago.

"Good idea." Duke smiled and stood up. Tristan shot him a mean glance but it went unnoticed.

Everybody followed suit while Mai leaned over close to Joey. "Joey, is something wrong?" She asked, used to his sudden mood changes.

"Nope." Joey closed the menu and offered a cheerful grin. "Nothing at all!"

"All right…" Mai, still unsure, got up herself and followed the gang to the buffet area.

Serenity, who sat across from her brother, started up a conversation. "Well, I already know how you've been doing during these past couple of years." She began, smiling. "So I'll ask you about your wedding plans."

Joey leaned back in his chair. "We've got a local pastor hired and we're having the wedding outside instead…at the beach." Mai hadn't yet chosen her bride's maids and the maid of honor but she was planning to do so today. The wedding was in three weeks!

"That sounds nice!" Serenity went on. "Did you pick your best man yet?"

Time stopped. Joey's jaw once again dropped open. "B-best man?" He stammered. He and Tristan had been friends the longest but Yugi had proved time and time to be a great friend as well. Duke and Bakura weren't exactly being considered since he hadn't been friends with them as long or was as close so at least he was only risking the loss of one friend…or two. "I, uh, well, you see, I was, um…" He trailed off, one hand behind his head, another goofy, guilty grin to complete it. "I, er, haven't picked one yet!" He finished.

Serenity's eyes widened. "You haven't?" She too seemed to realize the situation.

"I'm picking one today!" He said quickly, noticing that Bakura was returning. "Let's talk about this later, huh? I've got a buffet to devour!" He jumped out of his chair, nodding at Bakura when he passed by, and set a course for the main course.

"Some things never change." Bakura commented as he sat down at the table. "You can go now." Serenity thanked him and stood up to go gather her own meal.

At the buffet place…

"So, Joey…" Tristan began. He was standing in front of the Wheeler, inspecting the crispy bacon from behind the glass guard. "Have you chosen a best man yet?"

Yugi, who was in front of Tristan, perked up at the mention of a best man. Who had Joey chosen? Both knew it had to be one of the two of them.

Joey nearly choked on a piece of bacon from his plate. Obviously he had already served himself some bacon before Tristan could. 'Gee! What's with everyone and this best man stuff!' He wondered and coughed away from the food onto a…elderly woman.

"Well!" The elderly woman frowned at the younger human being. "Disgusting! How dare you?"

"I didn't see you there!" Joey defended himself. "Honest! I was trying not to choke here, you know!" Be it a child or an adult, Joey's temper was always aroused when accusatory remarks were shot his way.

"What have you got yourself into this time, pal?" Tristan groaned, seeing the woman was not sufficed at all by Joey's justification. He said it rather rudely anyway.

"Hubert!" The frail woman called out from her husband.

An elderly man appeared at her side, seemingly out of nowhere. "Yes, Nora?"

"Man…she's got you whipped, doesn't she?" Joey smirked at the man.

"Joey Wheeler!"

"Ack! Mai, I swear, I didn't know she was there!" Joey pleaded to the younger woman who had now joined the little group.

"What were you saying about the old man now?" Tristan gloated, moving on ahead. "C'mon, you're holding up the line!" He gestured to the annoyed line of people behind his friend.

"You need to teach them good manners, while they're young!" The elderly woman addressed the future Mrs. Wheeler.

"I'm not his mother." Mai replied curtly, frowning at Joey anyway.

"Makes no difference." The woman turned her nose to the air and left for her own table, accompanied by her husband.

"Grr! Why I oughta—"

Mai silenced him. "Joey, please don't make anymore scenes." She then made her way back to their table.

"I didn't start it! Argh!" Joey moved forward and, using the tongs, grabbed himself several sausages. "Women!"

Serenity, the last of their company, behind him, sighed. "Joey, just get your food."

The minutes ticked by as the gang reminisced and laughed, enjoying their food and each other's company. All learned that Yugi and Tea had been dating for a year now, and that the Kaiba brothers were quite successful across the ocean. "I watch your show every week!" Mokuba declared to Bakura. "Where are you going to go next?"

"Hmm…that's a good question." Bakura paused, setting his fork down on the table. "I think Father is going to Argentina and I should be going to Greenland."

"So, are _you two _gonna get married any time soon?" Joey grinned at his tri-colored friend who blushed in return and looked down at his breakfast.

"It's too early for that, Joey." Yugi then responded.

"Yeah, sure!" Joey leaned back in his own chair and folded his arms behind his head, basking in the glory of being known as the man getting married.

Later on, after Mokuba paid the bill, the gang made their way outside. Yugi and Tristan both led Joey away from the group, careful not to arouse suspicion. "Remember what I was saying earlier?" Tristan said in a low voice and crossed his arms. "We want to know who your best man is going to be."

Joey twitched visibly and nervously. "Uh, do you have to know now?" He looked at both Yugi and Tristan and saw that they were both serious.

"Joey, I don't want this, this issue to make us all angry with each other but," Yugi took a deep breath. "We've been good friends for a long time, Joey."

"I've been your best friend longer!" Tristan added, shooting Yugi a frown.

"Yes, but I've saved your life a couple of times, Joey." Yugi pressed, returning the frown.

"That may be but who's the one that made fun of Kaiba with you?"

"Joey, who's the one who taught you more about friendship?"

"And who's the one that doesn't shove his winning-all-and-every-game streak in your face!"

"And who's the one that doesn't care about winning games but you!"

"And who's the one—"

"AH! Enough, enough, enough!" Joey rubbed his temples. "Tristan, you are my best friend. But Yugi is also my best friend. So you see…" He hesitated, still unsure of who to pick. Both were good choices and both had stuck by him through thick or thin. Tristan was good in a fight and Yugi was good in a tag team game of Duel Monsters. Tristan had been his best friend forever but Yugi had equally proved his friendship to be just as true.

Both men stared at him expectantly. "Well I've decided on…" Joey glanced at the two again, seeing their dead serious looks once again. "The thing is…er…I, I…" He stopped and then sighed, reaching into his pocket. "Here, let's flip a coin…"


	3. The Little Man

**A/N: Don't own YGO. The rest is at the bottom. **

* * *

The Little Man

Joey sat slouching on his couch, staring at his television set where a mindless comedy program was showing. It was just as well; it's not like he was really watching anyway. There was nothing to do. It was late evening and he knew he ought to go to bed soon. Tomorrow, there was work and he had to be at the Tux Hut to get fitted for his tuxedo. Tristan, Duke, Bakura, and Yugi would be meeting him there to get fitted for their own tuxedos.

The television screen blurred and his eyelids drooped, indicating he was going to be drifting off to sleep soon…

"…Mai…" he murmured, eyes fully closed.

_"I wonder what our kids will be like…"_

"Kids…our kids…"

_"Kids? What do you mean kids? Isn't it a little too early to be thinking about kids?"_

"Too…too early…zzzzzz…" Joey's snoring filled the air as the soon-to-be married man fell into a deep sleep…

_"WAAAHHH!"_

_Joey's brown eyes snapped open, fear deep within him. No! It couldn't be! He had been on the edge of lullaby land, ready to take a hundred year nap…or something that wouldn't take that long. Anyway…he was so close! Almost there! No! No! The irritating shriek of a newborn killed all dreams of getting a good night's sleep. "I think I'll start drinking coffee," he muttered, sinking against his soft, white, fluffy pillow. _

"_Honey, go see what he wants," Mai ordered drowsily, turning to the wall…and was never heard from again, at least until the morning. _

"_Isn't it your turn?" Joey asked, wincing when the cries of little Joey Jr. He waited for the answer that did not come. "Mai?" He waited again. Such a patient husband. "Mai…" He dragged out her name, hoping she would awaken and tend to the youngest of their children. _

"_WAAAHHH!"_

"_All right, all right! I'm comin'!" Joey grumbled, using his feet to push off the covers, knowing Mai had won this time._

_Due to his fatigue, Joey stumbled down the hallway, hitting the wall nearly every second step. Joey Jr.'s crying continued and it was getting so loud that Joey began to run towards his son's room, hoping the neighbors wouldn't call over again… "Those low-down, no good, snobbish—"_

"_WAAAHHH!"_

"_Hiya, JJ!" Joey burst into the nursery, flipping on the light switch. "Gah! My eyes!" One hand flew in front, covering his eyes from the light as the other groped the walls, moving slowly across the room. _

_At long last, he reached the crib where little JJ lay, screaming at the top of his lungs. When Joey Jr. saw his father, he quieted down to a small whimper, relieved that someone had heard him. _

"_Whatsa matter with you?" Joey reached in and picked up JJ, gently cradling him in his arms. "Huh?"_

"_Daddy?" There was a small tug on his sweatpants from a five-year-old. _

"_Hey, easy there,Maya." Joey turned his attention back to JJ as a suggestible smell reached his nose. He scrunched up his face. "Oh no…not again!"_

"_Papa?" Maya looked up at her father with tears in her eyes. "I wet the bed again."_

"_DAAADDDD!" An older child came running into the room with a frantic look in his eyes. "Chilidog and Corndog got into the garbage again!"_

"_Maya, go get some—what?" Joey then turned his attention to his eldest son, Joe. "AGAIN!" Darn those dogs! Chihuahua puppies were so curious. Well, at least these ones were. Chihuahua…memories of merciless puppy torture came back to him in a flash. "Grr…Kaiba!" Someday he would have his revenge!_

"_Daddy…" The oldest of the four children, seven-year-old Melissa, came into the nursery, holding her kitten. "Mingo was thirsty and I tried to get him some milk, and—"_

"_WAAAHHH!"_

"_My sheets are wet, Papa."_

"_Do I hafta clean up the garbage again?"_

"_I cleaned the milk but we can't have cereal in the morning now…"_

"_WAAAHHH!"_

"_Papa!"_

"_Dad? Dad?"_

"_I'm sorry, Daddy…"_

"_ARGH!" _

"JUST WAIT!" Joey shouted, jumping to his feet. He opened his eyes and blinked as the voice of the anchorman delivered the morning news. "What the? What time is it?" He rubbed at his eyes sleepily and dragged his aching body (from sleeping in an uncomfortable position) to where the hall clock ticked away. "Seven…seven-forty-five…WHAT? I'm gonna be late!" His job at the Welders Inc. started at eight in the morning and ended at four in the afternoon. It paid good money, better than what he had earned with his job at the nearby fast food restaurant, flipping burgers…

Drip! Drip!

He really needed to get that leak fixed.

"C'mon, feet, move!" Joey shouted, catching the attention of those walking by.

He figured he could catch a shower later after work before he left to get fitted for his tuxedo. Right now, he was in the underground parking lot and had to get to his car ASAP or he would be in big trouble with the boss, Mr. Olive Turtles. Joey had almost laughed out loud when he was introduced to the boss. The guy looked like a turtle—he even kept pet turtles and held races every Sunday at the park.

Upon reaching his car, he jammed the keys into the lock and unlocked the car, jumped in, and hit his head. "Not my day!" he grumbled as he fumbled with the keys again. The car started and he zoomed out of the lot and right into traffic. The first horn sounding of the day could be heard vaguely from inside the parking lot.

The day went by fairly quickly much to his surprise,and soon he found himself at the Tux Hut, parking his car next to Duke's vehicle. He dashed inside and ran straight to the counter, slamming his palm down on the little bell. "I'm here!"

A little man popped out from behind the counter. "Greetingssss, sssir!" He spoke like he had a snake's tongue and Dracula's accent. He was balding and had a little sharp, pointed goatee with beady little eyes. "My name isssss Loch Ssssmith. Vhat can I do for you, sssir?"

Joey raised one eyebrow, dumbfounded. "Ya got a speech problem, or somethin'?" he asked rather rudely.

"Oh, he's with us!" Yugi called out cheerfully from somewhere in the store.

"Really? In that cassse, vhy don't you follow me and I vill take you to your friendsssss. I'm asssssuming you mussst be the groom?" Loch asked as he led a much taller Joey into a special room where the fitting would be made.

"Ya got that right," Joey answered, looking around at all the pictures, magazines, pins… "Hey, are ya by any chance gonna to be sticking pins in my tux while _I'm_ in it?"

"Vhy, of courssse, sssir." Loch smiled a creepy smile, showing his yellow teeth. "Don't you vant your tuxedo to be the bessst fit posssssible?"

"Uh, yeah." Joey shuddered inwardly. 'Who is the nutcase?' he thought. 'Besides, Mai would probably be embarrassed if I wore a tiny or big suit.'

"Hey man!" Tristan clapped his hands on Joey's shoulders. "Ready to try out some penguin suits? We all chose some for you. We've got ours already, though."

"I can't spend too much time choosing the tux, guys," Joey announced when the rest joined him. "Mai vants, I mean _wants_ me to meet her at the beach later. So can we just get this over with?" He turned to the little man who wasn't there. "What? Where is he?"

"Over here, sssir!" Another little man with a slightly higher-pitched voice and different clothes suddenly appeared from behind a mannequin. "Vhat do you vant to try on firssst?"

"Hey, ya look like the other guy! Maybe ya are him!" Joey remarked incredulously. "How did you change clothes so fast?"

"Dude, what's wrong with you?" Tristan asked.

"He's been here the whole time," Bakura added. "His name is—"

"Chip. Chip Monk. Vhat ssssuit vould you like to try on firssst?" Chip repeated his earlier question.

"'Kay, this is getting freaky." Joey stepped away, closer to the door. "Just give me von, I mean _one_, ARGH!"

While his buddies stared at him strangely, Chip brought out the selections. "Here ve have a nice Electro-Orange, our ssssummer ssstyle tux."

"Whoa! Are ya kidding? Who picked that?" Joey demanded. "Mai will have a fit if I wore _that_ one to our wedding!"

"Fine. How about thissss one?" Chip held up a white one. "'Tissss von of our loveliest."

"For a disco king, maybe!" Joey smirked.

"White is very impractical," Yugi agreed.

Bakura shrank back. "Well, it looks nice from over here."

"Oh, sorry!" Yugi apologized. "I didn't mean to offend you, you know, because you have white hair—"

"You make him sound old!" Tristan laughed.

"No! I mean—"

"It's all right, Yugi." Bakura offered a warm smile with a hint of mischief in his eyes. "At least I don't have three different colors of hair."

"Hey!"

"Nice one, Bakura." Duke grinned.

"Uh…can we get back to me, please?" Joey pointed to himself. "Who's gettin' married here?"

"Okay, okay, you don't have to rub it in." Tristan crossed his arms. "Show us the next one."

"Ve have the classsic sssstyle right here."

"Now we're talkin'!" Joey grabbed the suit and glanced around. "Do ya have a dressing room or somethin' so I can try on this penguin suit?"

"Right over there, Joey." Yugi pointed to a door on the far left.

"Thanks."

A few minutes later, Joey came out of the dressing room looking very unhappy.

Our dear friends were trying so hard to contain their laughter.

"Um, I think it's a little too small for you," Yugi managed to croak out.

"Darn right it is!" Joey snapped. The sleeves and legs were too short and the white shirt was threatening to burst open. The place where the rear end was…was a little too tight… "My grandma is gonna be there!"

"Vhy don't you try thissss von on?" Chip suggested, bringing out another black tuxedo. "It ssshould be the right sssize."

"I hope so." Joey took the tux from the little man and went back into the dressing room to try it on. A little while later… "Yahoo! I found the right one!" He pushed open the door, accidentally squishing the little man who had been standing a little too close. "But I think it needs to be uh…henned a bit?"

"I think you mean _hemmed_," Bakura corrected him. "Yes, I believe so too."

"Hey Chip! Where are ya?" Joey's ears picked up a slight groan. "Oh, there ya are." He pulled the door towards him, revealing a red-nosed Chip. "What are ya doin' back there?"

"Sssso, you vill be taking that von, sssir?" Chip almost whispered.

"Yeah. C'mon, do your thing. I gotta run!" Joey checked his watch. "What do ya have to do?"

"Jussst let me get my thingssss." Chip walked to the opposite side of the room and grabbed a few items. "Ve jussst need to hem the ssssleevesss."

"Okay. Can ya hurry it up then—YEEOUCH! What did ya do that for?" Joey growled, yanking his hand to his chest.

"Pleasssse hold sssstill, sssir." Chip grabbed some more pins and stuck them all over the sleeve. "Ve sssshall have it ready tomorrow."

"Good. Can I go now?"

"Yessss, jusssst ssstop at the counter to pay."

"Vill do—AAAH! Quit messin' with my head!" Joey retreated to the dressing room angrily to undress,and then met his friends at the counter at the front of the Tux Hut. He pulled out his wallet. "Aw, gee, where is the other guy now?"

"Right here!" Loch Smith popped out from behind the counter again. "Vhat can I do for you, sssir?"

"Hey I could've sworn no one was behind there!" Joey pointed his finger at the man. "You've got a twin, don't ya?"

"Vhy, no, sssir—"

"Joey just pay the man so you can get to Mai!" Tristan sighed heavily. "He's been here all this time."

"Honestly, Joey, are you feeling well? A bit under the weather perhaps?" Bakura asked.

"If you ask me, I think something's wrong upstairs." Duke frowned.

"Nobody asked ya!" Joey snarled and placed the correct amount of money on the counter. "Here." He ran past his friends and out the door. "See ya guys soon!"

"Bye, Joey!"

"Later, pal!"

"Have a good day, sssir."

* * *

**A/N: Special thanks to my beta reader, Caorann fridh Bronách for proofreading this chapter. ****I don't own Joey's Boss' name, which is a commercial. ****The mystery of the best man's identity has not been revealed in this chapter! Maybe you won't find out until the wedding chapter!**


	4. The Guard Dog

**A/N: I don't own YGO. ****I also do not own the reference of Star Wars. ****IMPORTANT: I just realized there is another story about Joey and Mai getting married. Hopefully you ought to know by now that my story is completely different. I haven't read that other story but I just wanted to clarify something. Thank you.**

* * *

The Guard Dog

"What took you so long?" Mai demanded, hands on her hips, eyes of purple fire. "You are five minutes late!"

"Five minutes?" Joey ran his hand through his hair, mentally preparing for the worst.

"What's the matter? Is there an echo?" Mai crossed her arms. "I arrived here extra early to set everything up. With nothing else to do, I had to sit on the sand, with the radio on, letting everyone who passed by believe that I, of all people, was having a picnic with myself! Do you know how humiliating that is?" she finished sharply.

"Ha ha, that's kinda funny, Mai," Joey laughed nervously, "having a picnic with yourself…"

"Why are you late?" Mai nearly shrieked.

"Heh, heh, well you see, there's a funny story…" he began, cringing at Mai's icy look. "Well, um, I was waiting for this guy to finish henning—"

"Hemming," Mai corrected, rolling her eyes.

"Right! Right, uh, and he was taking really long so that's the reason why I'm late," Joey finished, gazing at her with hopeful eyes. "And did I mention that ya look beautiful?" Mai's ego was her weakness.

The blonde woman's eyes softened. "You think so?" she asked, having completely forgotten that he had been late. "I wasn't so sure because this dress doesn't really go with the shoes and the dress that does is at the cleaners and—"

"Trust me, ya look _fine_." Joey winked at her, knowing his obvious charm would cause her legs to turn to jelly.

"Thank you, Joseph Wheeler." Mai smiled seductively, pretending to fall prey to his silly attempt at trying to appear sophisticated, to appear like some sort of ladies' man.

Now that that was all done and over… "So! I'm hungry!" Joey dropped to his knees and reached inside the picnic basket. "I'm so hungry, I could eat a —YEOW!" Quickly pulling his hand out, Joey stared at the basket in horror, clutching his hand. "What do ya have in there?"

"It's a gift from your sister." Mai knelt down next to him and was about the pull back the small towel when she realized she had better explain everything beforehand, before other things occurred… "It's for both of us actually. Serenity wanted to give us an early wedding gift but know this: it's going to stay in your apartment until we find a house. And _you're_ going to clean up after it! I don't want to give it back nor take it to a shelter because it is adorable, but you, and I mean you" she paused- "will clean any very 'dirty' messes made…"

With a sinking feeling, Joey finally figured out just what the surprise was. Oh sure, he loved dogs but sometimes they got on his nerves whenever he was reminded of the "puppy torture" he'd endured as a teen.

"Here he is!" Mai pulled back the towel and a snarling, growling, tan-colored ball of fur leapt upon the wide-eyed, yelping, Joey Wheeler. "It's a Chihuahua."

"No kidding—argh!" Joey pushed the small puppy off of him and jumped to his feet. The puppy fell to the sand, growled at Joey, and then went over and plopped itself down beside Mai, eyeing Joey with a scrutinizing gaze. "A Chihuahua! But I—"

"No buts! This is a gift from your sister and you'd better keep it!" Mai ordered.

Defeated, Joey sat cross-legged, pouting.

"Humph." Mai flipped her hair back. "Here's your dinner," she declared, indicating a second picnic basket with a mini-cooler.

From grumpy to happy, Joey grabbed for a sandwich and sunk his teeth into it, enjoying the satisfying feeling of feeding his bottomless pit of a stomach.

"I'm going to go freshen up – save some for me, you hear?" Mai said and stood up, her cosmetic bag in hand.

"Mm-mm." CHOMP!

As Mai walked away, heading for the nearest washroom, Joey stole a glance at the Chihuahua who hadn't moved from its spot. 'I wonder if this pup is a boy or a girl?' Joey thought, locking eyes with the dog. "Hey, what are ya? Boy? Girl? I don't want puppies, you know!"

"Rrr," growled the Chihuahua.

"Gotta think of a name for ya." Joey paused from his feed and ran over several names mentally. "Spot, Spike, Corndog, Chilidog…mmm, hotdogs…I like 'em with relish…"

"Rrr."

"On a second though, mustard is better, no – ketchup!"

"Rrr."

"Yep. Can't have a hotdog without catsup."

"Rrr."

"Whoops. Guess the sound of a cat bugs ya, huh?"

"Rrr."

"Say, if you're just a puppy, do you even know cats exist?"

"Rrr…"

"I don't like cats very much. The last one I saw scratched me when I tried to rescue it from a tree…"

"Rrr…"

"Yep, cats are trouble – like Mai! Mai this, Mai that, I can't please her! Why am I marrying her anyway?"

"Rrr!"

"But Mai is beautiful and she does have her good side. I admire her for her determination and independence…yep, she's the one for me."

"Rrr!"

"So I suppose it doesn't matter if you're a girl or a boy because – hey, what are ya doing! Get off! Get off! Off! Ah!"

A few minutes later, Mai returned only to find the spot she had reserved for her and Joey's dinner date, empty. "Where is that dork?" she wondered out loud, scanning the beach. There were only a few other people present and they were laughing and pointing… "Oh my – what does he think he's doing?" Mai watched with amusement at the sight of her fiancé jumping around in the surf, clothes no less, with a sandwich in hand, and one Chihuahua puppy barking madly, caring little about getting wet.

Needless to say, Joey returned to his apartment that evening humiliated. His clothes were soaked, too. Not to mention a drenched puppy already making itself comfortable in its doggy bed. Earlier, Serenity had entered the apartment (through having a key of her own) and dropped off some dog supplies.

"So cold…" Joey murmured, dropping his set of keys on the coffee table. "I'm gonna take a nice hot shower."

And so, Joseph Wheeler showered and was suddenly launched into a daydream. Perhaps a daymare, if such a word ever existed…

"_I have told you time and time before – don't start fights!" Mai frowned disapprovingly at her teenage son. _

"_Yeah, finish 'em!" Joey remarked, looking up from watching the news. _

"_Joey!" Mai snapped, "I give up! Joey, you go to Parent-Teacher interviews tonight with Jason."_

"_Aw, fine."_

"_And tell your son to smarten up!"_

"_My son? How come he's always MY son at these times?"_

"_Because that's where he gets it from!"_

"_Uh, yeah, I'm right here, Mom, Dad…" fifteen-year-old Jason mumbled, looking from one parent to the other. "You don't have to talk as if I'm not here."_

"_Don't get mouthy with me, young man!" _

"_Mom! I wasn't—"_

_Sighing, Joey stood up and stalked over to the hall closet. "Come on, Jase," he muttered, calling his son by his nickname. 'We ought to leave now. Mai is steamin'!' Joey thought, still amazed by how much both he and Mai had changed over the years. Many years before, Mai would've been this upset over smudged lipstick…_

_The drive to Domino High was silent yet comfortable, for Joey and Jason got along fairly well and were quite close, despite Jason having reached the dreaded teenage years. _

"_Who's your teacher again?" Joey asked, stepping out of the vehicle. _

"_Ms. Snew."_

_Joey burst out laughing. "Ms_. Snew_?" _

"_Don't laugh, Dad. I got in trouble for laughing at her name on the first day of school, remember? She's really uptight…and she looks a lot like her cat too. She has a lot of pictures of her cat on her desk."_

"_Thanks for the warning," Joey said dryly, leading the way into the school. He stopped once he was inside, aware of the fact that there were different teachers now and things had changed a bit since he had gone here. "Now, which way?" _

_There was a long, dragging cough. "Joey? Joey Wheeler?" wheezed an old man. "Is it really you?"_

"_Uh…yeah, sure!" Joey chuckled, unsure of him. "Yep, it's me alright. How, uh, have ya been?" he asked politely. Who was this guy?_

_The man waved his cane around. "I been doing fine. I'm still picking up after these young whippersnappers." _

"_Dad?" Jason whispered into his father's ear. "We have to go now."_

"_Right! We gotta go now…uh…" Joey racked his brain for the name of this obvious janitor. What was a guy this old still doing in the school? Did he not want to retire?_

_The man didn't take the hint. "See you, sonny." _

"_Who was that guy?" Joey asked his son when they were out of earshot. _

"_Mr. Delton," came the glum reply. _

"_Delton, Delton — Mr. Delton!" Joey burst out, recognizing the name at last. "He's STILL here!" At Jason's nod, he continued, "Wow, he must be 90 years old by now!"_

"_Here's Ms. Snew's room." Jason checked the list and opened the door to the classroom where Ms. Snew was sitting. _

"_And you must be Jason's father." Ms. Snew stood up and offered a hand, a smile upon her face…a smile that gave off the impression that she had sniffed something very unpleasant. "I'm Ms. Snew—"_

_Joey snickered. _

_Ms. Snew arched an eyebrow. _

_Joey coughed several times. "Sorry, I was just, uh, remembering a good joke…" Joey apologized, ignoring the smirk on his son's face. _

'_Like father, like son,' Ms. Snew thought and nodded shortly. "I see. Please sit down." She indicated two chairs in front of her desk. "I want to discuss your son and his tendency to fight in class."_

"_I didn't start the last one!" Jason protested. _

"_Quiet!" Ms. Snew snapped and Jason did as he was told. "As I was saying…Mr. Wheeler, Jason here seems to be incapable of keeping his hands to himself and—" A cell phone rang. "One moment, please," she said and flipped open her phone. "Hello? Is my Fluffy doing okay? Oh no? Mr. Fluffy won't eat his dinner? Put him on the phone, please."_

_Joey leaned over and whispered, "She named a kid, Fluffy?" _

"_No," Jason answered, stifling a chuckle, "that's her cat."_

"_She hired a babysitter for her cat?" Joey turned back to Ms. Snew and the conversation. _

"_Hello, Fluffy!" Ms. Snew cooed (no pun intended), "How are you? I miss you! Why won't you eat your dinner?" With that she proceeded to make kissing noises. "Good food! Be a dear and eat your food, Fluffy dearest."_

_Joey groaned. This was gonna be a long one…_

Joey snapped out of his daydream and nearly jumped out of his skin. He was still in the shower and by now the water had gone cold. Somehow he had managed soap his body and even shampoo his hair. "Sometimes, I amaze even myself," Joey said to himself and turned off the water, stepping out onto the floor towel. "I suppose I have to feed that dog now."

After drying himself off, Joey slipped into his boxer shorts, a nightshirt, and opened the door, revealing the cute, little Chihuahua.

"Rrr…"

"Oh no…not again!"

"Rrr…"

Joey put one foot onto the carpeting…

"Bark!"

Pulling his foot back fast, Joey glared at the dog. "I think I'll name ya Chewie, as in Chewbacca from Star Wars. Ya sure act like him!"

There was no response.

Joey attempted to leave the bathroom again.

"Rrr!"

"Oh great, do I have to stay in the bathroom all night or what?" he yelled at the dog. "Listen here, I ain't gonna let ya control my life! I'm stepping out of here and I'm going to sleep…no, wait, I have to feed ya, so if ya want food, let me out of here!" he finished furiously.

"Bark!"

"Argh!"

With a sigh, Joey sank to his knees and held his head in his hands. Mai was coming over tomorrow to discuss what kind of food would be served at the wedding reception. He seriously needed some sleep…but this, this _dog_ was making him a prisoner in his own bathroom!

With a sigh, he decided to make the best out of the situation. He didn't really want a dog bite and he was too tired to make a run for it. So without further ado, he lay on his backside and tried to go to sleep…

* * *

Drip! Drip! 

Darn that leak!

Moaning slightly, Joey opened his eyes and realized immediately that his body was stiff from sleeping in an awkward position. "Aw, man…" he groaned and sat up, staring right into the chocolate-brown eyes of Chewie. "Yee!" Joey jumped to his feet unceremoniously, knocking the dog off his chest. Apparently Chewie found Joey's chest more inviting than his own dog bed.

"Joey, what in the world are you doing? Here, boy, come here!"

"Bark!" The little dog bounced over to Mai Valentine, happy to see her. He then stood by her leg, watching Joey with curiosity.

"What were you doing to the dog?" Mai demanded.

Joey moaned again, rubbing his arm. "Mai…what are ya doing here? What time is it? And it was Chewie's fault!" He pointed at the dog, wishing he had some sort of rolled-up newspaper to exercise his disciplinary skills…

"Chewie?" Mai echoed, petting the dog gently on the head. "Is that what you decided to name him?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah." Joey blinked several times. "So, why are ya here so early?"

"Joey, it's ten in the morning. I told you I was coming over to discuss what kind of food we're going to have at the wedding reception!" Mai responded exasperatedly. "Don't you remember? Honestly, Joey…" She shook her head as she made her way into the kitchen and sat down at the table.

"Hang on, hang on…" Joey turned in the direction of his bedroom. "I'm going to go change!" he called over his shoulder.

"Humph."

Minutes later, Joey emerged from the bedroom, dressed in clean clothes and ready to discuss his favorite subject: food!

Mai pulled out a notepad and scanned the list of items. "I was wondering…do you think we should serve orange juice or fruit punch? What about the rice, the chicken, the—"

"Hotdogs!" Joey declared, adding the food item to his own personal list. "Nothing like a good hotdog."

"Hotdogs?" Mai frowned. "Joey, we have to serve…" She searched for the right word. "We have to serve…_sophisticated_ dishes."

"Oh, and chicken is sophisticated?" Joey retorted rudely.

"When it's arranged the right way!"

"The right way! What do ya want, chicken or a bouquet of flowers?"

"Argh! You are so uncouth!"

"Uncouth? What's that supposed to mean?"

With a heavy sigh, Mai buried her face in her hands. "I can't even begin to imagine how you're going to act in front of my parents."

"Y-your parents?" Joey stuttered. "Your _parents_ are coming over?"

"Yes, they're flying in today from America and want to meet you. Not only that; all of my sisters are coming, too, plus all my relatives…" Mai explained with a scowl.

"Gee, that's a lot of people to fly in," Joey remarked. "That's pretty expensive."

"They're rich. They can handle it and what's more is they want the very best for their oldest daughter," Mai went on, staring out the window.

"Who's their oldest daughter?"

"Me, you dimwit!"

"Well, sorry!" Now it was Joey's turn to bury his face in his hands. "Great. Every guy's worst nightmare…meeting his girlfriend's parents!"

* * *

**A/N: D****ream sequences won't always be in every chapter. Any suggestions for names for the real children?**


	5. The Valentines

**A/N: Don't own YGO but I do own my original characters. Sorry about the wait. Thank you to Caorann fridh Bronach for beta reading. Thank you for your _patience_…if you're still reading this story. Borrowed a name from One Piece – don't own it. I also don't own another name from Fire Emblem. '…thoughts…' NOTE: I haven't seen anything after the Doom Saga, I believe. My interest has lagged so most likely, there will be no references to the new season in this story. **

* * *

The Valentines

Joey nervously paced the floor inside the airport waiting area. He was dressed in a nicely padded jacket, blue jeans, a white T-shirt, and decent shoes. They were his best, casual, easy-going clothes, which he hoped would give his fiancée's parents a good impression that he was not a slob. Unless, of course, Mai mentioned that little embarrassing fact that he was indeed somewhat of a slob…

"I'm gonna be okay. I'm gonna be okay. I'm gonna be-"

"_I'm_ not going to be okay if you don't stop walking in circles!" Mai scolded, "You're making me dizzy!"

"Don't watch, then!" Joey shot back and immediately felt a tad guilty. All this stress over meeting her parents was taking its toll on him. "Look, all I ask is for a little sympathy because I'm about to meet your parents and hope that they'll approve of me."

"And that we'll get my father's blessing," Mai added, crossing her arms. "You better be on your absolute best behavior, Joey, because my family is very strict about manners and class."

"Are ya implying I don't have class!"

Mai ignored him. "Look, my father is very friendly. My mother is very watchful and observant. And my sisters are a handful…"

"How many sisters ya got?" Joey asked, hoping she had two and not ten…

"Five and not including me."

"_Five_!" Joey yelped, his eyes nearly bulging clear out. "_Five sisters_!"

"And one cousin, who is really my brother. I mean, he acts like one." Mai sighed. "I'm the oldest of all my sisters, and their names are Vivian, Sharon, Bronwen, Nami, and Josie. My cousin's name is Ephraim," Mai added, right away noticing Joey break the world's record for jaw dropping again.

"…I think I'm going to cry…" Joey mumbled.

"Oh, you'll be fine!" Mai stood up and put her arms around his shoulders. "Just act like you normally would – no, better not, that might not be a good idea."

"You're very supportive," Joey grumbled, staring numbly outside. "So, when are they coming?"

"Soon," Mai answered, giving him a peck on the cheek. "Actually, they should be here…" she murmured, glancing at the clock on the wall. "…Right about…now!"

"Mai, honey!" a deep voice boomed, causing Joey to release a small yelp and jumped about an inch off the floor. "It's _so_ good to see you!"

"Daddy!" Mai suddenly transformed into a squealing little girl. "Oh, Daddy, I missed you!" she cried as she literally flew into her father's arms.

'Okay, Mai is clearly Daddy's Girl,' thought Joey, and the male blonde gave a once-over look at his future father-in-law (hopefully). Mr. Valentine was tall, blonde like his daughter, a moustache, and…muscular! 'This guy must've been a boxing champ before he retired into…business!' Mr. Valentine was dressed in a business suit but it was evident that he had been in some kind of sport that involved immense strength. 'Calm down, Wheeler, calm down…she said he was friendly, so that's got to be good, right?'

"Where is everyone else?" Mai asked, clinging to her father's arm. "Oh! Joey, come here and meet Daddy!"

Joey was as still as a board, a smile frozen in place.

Mai raised an eyebrow. "Uh, Joey? Come here and meet him."

"This is Joey Wheeler?" Mr. Valentine asked, also giving him a once-over. "Nice to meet you, boy!" He laughed. "And Mai, everyone is on their way. I just had to see you as soon as possible!"

'Come on, feet, move!' Joey continued to smile. His mind defeated his body in the battle of wills and Joey was now walking towards the Valentines. 'Now what do I do?' he thought frantically, standing in front of the two other blondes. 'Hold out your hand – just do it!' Joey held out his hand. "Uh…nice to eat – I mean meet! Nice to meet ya, Mr. Valentine! I'm Joey…Joey Wheeler."

"He already knows your name," Mai remarked. "Didn't you hear him?"

"Oh, that's okay." Mr. Valentine waved it away. "Hello, Joey, I'm Hiram Valentine. The rest of the family should be along any moment now." He shook Joey's hand, much to Joey's displeasure.

"…That's…great!" Joey burst out despite the pain of his perfectly good hand being squeezed to death. "Ha ha! Terrific!"

"Simmer down," Mai hissed when her father turned around to call the Valentine family over. "Take it easy."

"Take it easy? Yeah, sure…I can do that." Joey nodded as he spoke. "No sweat…" he muttered when she faced away from him.

"Joey! I'd like you to meet my wife, Melody." Hiram gestured to a lovely middle-aged brunette.

"Hello," Melody greeted him with a smile although her eyes were full of suspicion.

"Our daughters…this is Vivian."

Vivian had very short, blonde hair, cut in an elegant style and she was busy fiddling with her cell phone. "Tsk. This just isn't working – oh, hi." The girl obsessed with technology.

'Okay…' Joey nodded his head.

"This here is Sharon."

Sharon also had blonde hair only it was done in a braid, almost as long as Mai's hair. This girl was into fashion and wore very sophisticated clothes and plenty of make-up. She smirked and said in an oh-so-sexy voice, "Hi, Joey…"

Joey's smile became frozen again, unsure of what to do. 'Great. Mai is going to be steaming…'

Sweatdropping, Hiram continued. "This is Bronwen."

Bronwen had shoulder-length brown hair instead of the infamous Valentine blonde. "Hi," came the dull reply. The young woman was a stare-cow…since she herself thought there was nothing better to do at the moment.

'She's freaking me out!' Joey shuddered inwardly.

"Enthusiasm is not in her vocabulary," Hiram explained and pointed to the next daughter. "This is Nami."

Nami was another brunette, only her loose and flowing hair ended at the waist, it seemed. Nami greeted Joey with a warm smile. "I am delighted to finally be introduced to you, Mr. Wheeler! Please, forgive our tardiness." Okay, this one had to be the smart one; the one who always got an A in every subject and used "big" words…

'Maybe I'll have to carry a dictionary around.' Joey gave a mental chuckle.

"Last, but certainly not least," Hiram said, "this is our youngest, Josie."

"Hey!" Josie ran right up to Joey, giving him a quick hug and shaking his hand with so much zeal, Joey was sure his arm could have come out of its socket… "I'm Josie Valentine! It's so great to meet you! You know, when Mai told us the news, I couldn't believe it…"

'She talks too much!' Joey nodded, trying to keep up with her words.

Josie was a natural blonde, but with having a sort of wild personality, the girl had dyed her hair pink…

"Dearest, let's not forget our nephew." Melody stepped back and laid a hand on her nephew's shoulder, bringing him to the front. "Joey, this is Ephraim Stevenson from my side of the family."

Ephraim was tall with short, navy blue hair and unmistakably purple eyes that literally matched Mai's own purple orbs. His eyes were narrowed and he did not express any form of acknowledgement of Joey's presence.

'Smile doesn't seem to be in _his_ vocabulary,' Joey reckoned, nodding. 'I wonder what his problem is.'

Meanwhile, Mai was gritting her teeth in annoyance at Sharon and wondering what to do next.

But her mother decided that for her: "Why don't we all grab a bit of lunch somewhere?" Melody suggested, clasping her hands together.

"I know just the place," Mai said. "The restaurant where Joey proposed to me!"

Mai chattered all about it as she led her family out of the airport. Joey was about to follow and catch up with her when he felt a hand pull him back, almost violently. "Yee!" Joey struggled free from the unknown stranger's grip and spun around, only to see Ephraim and to hear:

"I'm watching you. You had better not try anything."

"T-Try? To…Mai?" Joey stuttered. What could he do? The guy was outlandish, unconventional, bizarre…in Joey's words, he was _freaky_!

Ephraim's glare strengthened. "Yes, Mai," he affirmed. Ephraim was the embodiment of the over-protective brother (even if he was only Mai's cousin).

'Who does he think he is – wait, wait, I have to be nice…for a little while…' Joey sighed. "Look, pal, I wouldn't do anything to your cousin." He stopped – now was _not_ the time to pour out his true feelings to Mai. It wasn't even the right person! All his lovey-dovey words would have to wait until the wedding or at least until he began writing his wedding vows.

The blue-haired young man only frowned and left to catch up with the Valentines.

"Eh. Friendly fellow, isn't he?" Joey muttered, catching the attention of nearby people. "What are ya looking at?" he hollered at them and then ran after Mai.

* * *

"So I said to the guy…" 

"And we're off on another one of Josie's dumb jokes," Mai whispered, leaning towards Joey.

"You mean the last five hundred weren't…the last!" Joey hissed back, obviously exaggerating, although it had seemed like five hundred.

Mai sympathized, squeezing his hand under the table. "Just hang on."

"Here we are!" A waitress, accompanied by other waiters and waitresses, brought forth the delicious-looking meals for all present. Each aroma from each meal could cause even the fullest person's stomach to rumble. Everything looked simply divine.

Digging in immediately, Joey lifted a forkful of pasta that was about to enter his mouth when:

"Do you like cheese?"

Confused, Joey turned to his right where Bronwen was sitting, her usual blank stare creeping him out yet again. "…What?"

"Do you like cheese?" she repeated, holding out the Parmesan bottle. "On your pasta."

His previous questions concerning her sanity vanished. "Oh. Thanks." He graciously took the bottle and shook some Parmesan cheese onto his pasta. "Forgot about that."

Bronwen said nothing and returned to her own meal.

"So, Joey," Hiram boomed. "Tell us a bit about yourself," the man suggested, taking a small sip of his soft drink.

Joey set his fork down, feeling suffocated by all the eyes upon him. "Uh, heh, heh, sure." He cleared his throat. "I work as a-"

"Oh, we already know what you are!" Josie interrupted, grinning. "What were you like as a teenager, huh? Were you, like, _bad_?"

Bang!

Everyone turned to where Vivian sat. "My pocket calculator isn't working," Vivian explained. "I was just totaling up the costs of our meals."

"The total will be $166.79!" Nami declared brightly. "I managed to catch a glimpse of all the meals on the menu and kept in mind which ones you all ordered. I already knew what I desired, so I took to reading everything to pass the time!"

'What a memory!' Joey sighed and considered Josie's question. "When I was a teenager, I played Duel Monsters." 'Great one, Joey!' He mentally gave himself a whack in the head. 'Who wants to hear about that? Humph. They should! I was a finalist in both Duelist Kingdom and Battle City!'

"You played Duel Monsters?" Mrs. Valentine echoed, arching a well-groomed eyebrow. "How…quaint."

"I played it, too, Mother," Mai pointed out, frowning. "Joey and I were both finalists in Duelist Kingdom and Battle City. Duelist Kingdom was where we met, you know. I thought he was such a dork back then."

"Yeah? Well, I thought ya were-" Joey hesitated, remembering where he was. "A fine, young lady!" he finished proudly. Mai shot him a strange look.

Melody changed the subject. "Mai, sweetie, how about we go shopping after this? All of us girls."

"Yes!" Mai swallowed a bite of food. "I need you girls to try on some bridesmaid dresses."

"Wonderful." Melody turned to her husband. "You and Ephraim will be able to bond with Joey."

"Sounds like a great idea!" Hiram smiled. "A little man-to-man-_to_-_man_ talk."

Joey forced a grin. "Yeah. Great. Terrific."

* * *

**A/N: I am using Canadian currency, and I won't be going into details regarding whether the Valentines can read the menu in Japanese or not. That's not what you're here for, right? All of Mai's sisters and her one cousin were created for humor purposes only, as well as to cause a few problems. None of them are going to "fall in love" or have someone "fall in love" with them. ****And these OCs will not take up every chapter. They'll be around until after the wedding.**

**And, please, review. It lets me know you took the time to read this. Thanks to FFN's new features, I know who the people are who put this on their list(s), but don't review. Please consider it.**


End file.
